Why you should ‘fit your own mask before helping your child’…..

While interstate travel and overseas holidays are postponed for the foreseeable future due to the COVID-19 pandemic, I want to remind all parents of important pre-flight safety instructions:

In an emergency, parents should fit their own oxygen mask before helping their children.

This advice may go against your parental instinct; however, a child’s well-being depends on the well-being of their parents and caregivers. In the time of a global pandemic, this has never been more important. 

With Victoria in lockdown again, many parents are confronted with increased stress arising from health and safety concerns, increased demands of remote learning, balancing work obligations, greater financial strain, and lockdown fatigue. With all of these worries it is completely understandable that parents are feeling overwhelmed. These responses, while completely understandable, may make it difficult to maintain the stable, and secure “home base” your child needs during this crisis. 

What does this mean for parenting during a pandemic?

While many parents put their needs last, it is important that you take care of yourself. Parenting is an important and challenging job, that is made even more difficult by the pandemic and associated stressors. When you take care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally you can more effectively give your children what they need to thrive. When you look after your own wellbeing, you can foster resilience and be responsive and compassionate to your child’s emotional needs. Plus, you are modelling the importance of self-care so your children can learn from your example!

Self-care during the COVID-19 lockdown

Self-care is defined as the practice of taking actions to maintain or improve your own health and wellbeing, especially during periods of stress. 

Lockdown and social distancing have likely hindered common coping strategies (e.g.  visiting family and friends) therefore it is even more important that you continue practicing self-care. You may need to get creative or consider new activities to use during the COVID-19 pandemic. Here are some examples of self-care activities that may help you maintain good health and improve your well-being. 


  1. Physical Self-Care:  Exercise by going on a walk, eating healthily and at regular time intervals, reduce screen use before bed to improve sleep quality.  Try a youtube dance class, parkour move or jump on a bike with the kids!
  • Psychological/Emotional Self-Care: Write in a journal to help reflect on your day, complete a mindfulness exercise, practice deep breathing, re-read a favourite book or watch a movie, revisit an enjoyable hobby (e.g.  play a musical instrument), watch a funny youtube clip that makes you LOL!
  • Social Self-care: Schedule a regular phone call or facetime with a friend, check in on relatives, schedule something fun with your kids – maybe a picnic in the backyard or “The Floor is Lava” indoors on a rainy day!
  • Spiritual – Write a list of things your grateful for, go into nature (subject to lockdown restrictions), meditate, try yoga.  
  • Covid-19 specific self-care:  Limit your daily consumption of Covid-19 news media.

Remember – not only is it okay to care for yourself, it is in fact recommended as happy, balanced parents are one of the building blocks of happy, balanced kids!

Rebecca Loizou is a psychologist at the Northern and Hawthorn Centre for Child Development.  Rebecca is passionate about working with children and adolescents. She believes in working collaboratively with families, schools and other professionals in order to create strong support systems for young people.    Rebecca has experience working with a variety of clients presenting with developmental and mental health challenges. 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *