Author: Amanda Abel

Hi guys! I’m Simone, the newest clinician to join the Centre for Child Development.  I’ve been described as a tech-enthusiast and most recently, the ‘Anti-Pauli Effect’ – don’t worry – I had to Google that last one too (I recommend it if you have time for a giggle).  In addition to my work helping young people and their parents achieve positive learning, relationships, mental health and wellbeing across the lifespan, I’m a bit of a technology nerd.  By ‘a bit’, I mean ‘a lot’; and although my PhD thesis explored the use of apps in therapy with young people, I don’t discriminate.  Apps, smartphones, tablets, computers, wearables, gaming systems – you name it, I’m all over it!  To encourage greater understanding and positive relationships with technology, I’m going to share tips and insights based on the latest research.

When used appropriately, smartphones can actually be helpful for young people.  That’s right, the iPhone you can’t seem to separate from your child’s hand can actually do some good! Here are two ways that smartphones can actually be helpful:

1. Smartphones can allow kids to stay connected with friends.  In some cases, this connection may even increase the quality of their friendships. Of course you’ll need to address appropriate use of the phone in terms of ettiquete (i.e. is it okay to use the phone at the dining table? What would adults think if you were frequently checking your phone while they’re talking to you?) and safe behaviour (i.e. sending images and bullying spring to mind here).
2. Smartphone apps can also be helpful, with research showing some apps can reduce symptoms associated with anxiety. We even use these apps in the clinic! I’ll be sharing more about the types of apps that can be helpful over the coming weeks, but in the meantime have a think about which areas in your child’s life technology/apps might help? It can be a great way to motivate a somewhat reluctant child to practice relaxation and mindfulness!

It’s important to remember that we can all experience challenges negotiating our relationships whether it’s with parents, siblings, children, colleagues, food or exercise.  Technology is no different – as Oscar Wilde said, “everything in moderation”.

As always, we really recommend that you address boundaries and household expectations around the use of smartphones in your home to avoid any challenges or negative effects of overuse etc.

 

Simone is a registered psychologist who recently submitted her PhD in Educational and Developmental psychology. She is dedicated to helping children, adolescents and parents achieve positive learning, relationships, and wellbeing across the lifespan. A lover of technology and gaming, she developed a successful e-learning iPad program to support second language acquisition in a private language school. Her PhD research investigated how smartphone apps can be used to support adolescents in therapy. In addition to technology and all things Harry Potter, she has considerable experience working in primary and secondary school environments training teachers and parents in the use of technology to aid communication and learning. She is trained in Cross-Battery Assessment of cognitive and academic abilities and ensures a flexible, responsive approach to providing evidence-based psychological services. Simone is sensitive to cross-cultural issues; fluent in both English and Greek. She is an Associate Member of the Australian Psychological Society, and former representative on the National Committee of Educational and Developmental Psychologists. An occasional lecturer and teaching associate at Monash University in postgraduate psychology and counselling programs, Simone is passionate about marrying the latest research evidence with psychological services.

Madeline Sibbing – Psychologist at Northern Centre for Child Development

Adolescence – it’s an inevitability and a time in our childrens’ lives that many of us dread.  I love this quote about the adolescent years – “Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.” That Earl Wilson, he was one clever dude.

In all honesty, though, adolescence can be a truly exciting time – during which young people start to develop their own opinions, to take on greater responsibility, to contribute more to the world, expand their horizons and begin to develop their unique identity. So, rather than simply ignore it and “ride it out” – how can we embrace this exciting time and stay connected with our teenagers?

 

1. Be around – this sounds obvious, right? But one thing I learned from many years working in a secondary school is that teenagers still need us just as much, if not MORE, than they did during primary school. Many parents think their kids are now in secondary school so it’s a great time for them to both return to full-time work.  Keep in mind, however, that the transition to secondary school is huge for all kids, especially those with ASD, ADHD, anxiety or other challenges.  This is a time when they need their parents’ time and attention more than ever. It is also a time when they will be increasingly connected to friends outside of school and online – so our availability to talk through problems is absolutely vital.
2. Exploit those ‘captive’ moments – yep, a car ride is no longer just a car ride! When teens are ‘captive’ in the car and not sitting facing you having to make eye contact, this is the perfect time to ‘casually’ raise topics or inquire about their day. Open-ended questions or conversational invitations using your own comments (eg. “wow I’m exhausted from my professional learning at work today – I don’t know how you do it for six lessons each day!”) are a great way to encourage conversation from your teens.
3. Get involved – no, I’m not suggesting putting on a leotard and joining your daughter in ballet class! Just get involved in their hobbies and show interest in their social circles:

• Play that video game with them. That way you know what it is about (and can monitor appropriateness) as well as sharing in the experience with them!
• Invite their friends over or offer to drop them home. That way you can meet their parents and develop a network of people caring for your teen’s friendship group.
• Read the books they’re into – you might find that a bit of teen fiction is actually quite enjoyable! And added bonus, there’s another connection for you both!

I’ve no doubt that if you can connect, both you and your teen will absolutely reap the benefits. You will get to see that fabulous mind and personality as it blossoms and they will benefit from the security and connection with one of the most important people in their life.

This article was written by Madeline Sibbing for Northern Centre for Child Development – a paediatric psychology practice in Melbourne. Madeline is a Paediatric Psychologist with a Master of Educational and Developmental Psychology from Monash University. Her fifteen years of professional experience has been attained within government and independent schools in assessment, therapeutic interventions and consultation with children, adolescents, parents and teachers. She also developed primary prevention programs, mental health awareness activities and teacher training in a secondary college. Madeline spent several years working as an Educational Psychologist in London, UK, as a Chartered member of the British Psychological Society before returning to Melbourne, Australia. Madeline works with all ages at the Northern Centre for Child Development in Preston (Melbourne), from young children through to adolescents and parents. She is able to adapt her therapy accordingly, using playful, creative therapy and parenting strategies for younger children and for older children and adolescents she employs Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Solution-focussed Therapy and mindfulness techniques.

Photo credit: RAYUL on Unsplash

Madeline Sibbing, Psychologist at Northern Centre for Child Development

Being a working Mum is hard work.  You get home from a long day at work, your kids are hangry, you’re trying to explain to your partner how your NBN connection STILL isn’t working (true story), and your 3-year-old keeps shouting “Mummy mummy mummy mummy water!”

It’s enough to make your brain explode!

This is a frequent scenario in my household – so, many years ago I learned this simple tip for teaching pre-schoolers to WAIT. Yes you read that correctly, my children CAN now ACTUALLY WAIT!

It’s totally simple – and it only requires consistency and a bit of perseverance to pull it off.

Here’s the trick – credit goes to someone on the internet somewhere sometime ago for teaching me this strategy:

1. Child interrupts your conversation or your task
2. Stretch out your arm and extend your hand
3. Explain to the child that if they want your attention, they need to place their hand on yours.
4. When the child has placed their hand on yours, you place your other hand on top of theirs. (This acknowledges that you know they are waiting).
5. Commence with a short wait that you think your child can cope with initially. Even 5-10 seconds is a good start.
6. Praise the child warmly and thank them for “waiting quietly” or whichever words feel right for you! And immediately give them your full attention.
7. Keep doing this each time they go to interrupt. Extend the wait time gradually each time.

Good luck and happy waiting!

This article was written by Madeline Sibbing for Northern Centre for Child Development – a paediatric psychology practice in Melbourne. Madeline is a Paediatric Psychologist with a Master of Educational and Developmental Psychology from Monash University. Her fifteen years of professional experience has been attained within government and independent schools in assessment, therapeutic interventions and consultation with children, adolescents, parents and teachers. She also developed primary prevention programs, mental health awareness activities and teacher training in a secondary college. Madeline spent several years working as an Educational Psychologist in London, UK, as a Chartered member of the British Psychological Society before returning to Melbourne, Australia. Madeline works with all ages at the Northern Centre for Child Development in Preston (Melbourne), from young children through to adolescents and parents. She is able to adapt her therapy accordingly, using playful, creative therapy and parenting strategies for younger children and for older children and adolescents she employs Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Solution-focussed Therapy and mindfulness techniques.

Photo credit: Sai De Silva on Unsplash